JUST MAN

He is man,

Powerful, driven with the pride of a lion’s roar.

I stand in awe of his raw strength

Immersed in the urge to see each means to its end

Down to earth he stands

Struggling through the sands of time

Sometimes he forgets he’s just man.

Just man not without flaws

And claws caught in dreams sucking and draining from him like straws

Thirsty for the satisfaction normalcy could never bring.

He’s just man…but sometimes he forgets.

He sets his goals beyond the heights of heavens where no one knows

On his toes he stands so close to dip his fingertips in the clouds

And writes his name across the skies so his greatness shows.

He’s just man…but sometimes they doubt

So they abandon their routes and set out quests to the attest how his success abounds

Rounds of ammunition they fire aimed for his head, his chest

But his heart still pounds and his mind remains sound

Feet planted firmly upon the ground

He talks easy with order

His aura speaks in volumes so there’s no reason to shout

Yes, he’s just man but with reason they doubt.

His style is class meets swagger

The paths he treads many stagger on

And though sometimes his tasks get harder

He builds larger the legacy of loyal friend, visionary and hard worker.

He kneads his needs to feed his seeds

So his reputation precedes him as a dedicated father.

He’s just man…But sometimes I can’t comprehend.

His first impression is mirrored by his second

He tends to personify attributes of an immortal blend mere mortals brand a living legend.

Yet he is just man.

Drenched in the humidity of the humility he defines the basis of his humanity.

But that he is just man I still can’t comprehend

So I prefix him with super

I call him Superman.

SCORNED

See I gave him the truth of me

But he blinded his truth from me and chose to deceive

And though life has countless times cleansed me with second chances

Forgiveness from me he would never receive.

So now I hate men

Yes, I hate them all.

Because one cracked my skull and stirred my brains

Then reached into my wounds and coiled my veins

So all of them must take the fall.

Don’t dare tell me not to be bitter

I tasted the best of what I thought could only get sweeter

Liter after liter of sweetness slapped from my tongue

Slapped so hard it left my ears ringing

Ringing unlike my phone

Clinging unlike his hold

Stinging like the pain his absence is bringing

I’m screaming in madness with the voice that should be singing.

Don’t f**ken ask me not to be scorned

I’m pissed as hell for me, our two girls and boy never born

They’re stuck in the darkness before dawn

How the f*ck would they see the light

Without him to turn the switch on?

The blazes of hell could never match my fury

I have stacked my hands with spears to pierce their hearts

And I won’t bother to deny it to the jury.

They will pay; they all will pay duly

For I hate them, I hate them truly.

I have targeted them all one by one

And I won’t rest till they’re all done and gone

I’ve held vengeance prisoner and alongside dug my grave

I will enslave them before I kill them

I will slay all who stand in my way

No one is safe.

...SSSHHH

She said she wanted to do things to me that I normally wouldn’t

I mean she was a girl like me so really I shouldn’t

Right?

Or couldn’t I just for once ignore my golden rule and play it cool?

But who was I to ask?

My other girls would try to school me and boys would just drool

So I was lost in a pool of my own sexuality

Confused why her touch did not dissuade me from her advances

But rather left me amused.

I would barely even call that a touch

It was like the hairs on our skins slightly brushed

And desire shot through me like a wildfire

Building within a fever I’ve only known a man to inspire.

What was I to make of it?

What would become of forbidden lips pressed gently against mine?

Soft, wet: Just one kiss.

If men had bragged of the sweetness of this

And likened it to a virgin surrendering her chaste

What was to deny me a taste?

Furious from the uncertainty,

Yet curious still at the thrill of the reality of her standing a breath away

The status quo demanding I leave but my feet defiant enough to stay.

Unable to heel how I was beginning to feel

I let emotions tumble over like a cartwheel
My mouth, pursed, met hers

And then silence.

Dead silence.

Rhythm no more to my heart beat

Thoughts fleet,

Meaning no more to discreet as tongues greet

Silent excitement in sinful indulgence

She did as I pleased and with ease brought imagination to life

The men had been right; she was that sweet.

One kiss with her I would never forget

One girl, one secret I would never confess

Fenced safely in my conscience

That when all lies still I glance at that one chance I never took again.

I think of her and then…. Silence

………ssshhh

THE WRITE ROAD

I never really liked myself when I was growing up

Always felt like that drop of water left settled at the bottom of the cup

Unspoken for and ignored to be thrown out against the pavement

A mental enslavement to abandonment never endorsed.

My face embossed with tears, droplets dropping without remorse

Forced to merge with the forces of darkness with no true meaning of who I really was;

A girl undiscovered.

Night times caught me shivering without the cold but alone so I slept uncovered

Suffered to the bone and taunted by the shadows that hovered

Haunted by the ghosts of the unknown.

Most days were a daze treading passages built like a maze preceding my own amazement when I made it home

My bathroom mirror revealing a girl who stood inferior to her own reflection

Unforgiving to her errors oblivious to the greatness of her true person.

Confused by the blues of a girl standing in a woman’s shoes unable to choose the tools that separates her from the fools.

My heart beat me till I bruised.

The clock took stock of time with each tick tock interlocked with unwelcomed thoughts held deeper inside

My insides an intricate design of intestines and discomfort intertwined.

Those were the days of yesteryears when matter stood master over my mind.

Spent that portion of my youth in the pursuit of truth in all the wrong places I could find.

And then I wrote…

Morning came and joy did not always follow but I wrote away the sorrows and swallowed the reality pills held hostage in my throat

I stood president over my affairs when it became apparent that it only entailed that I afford myself the vote

Time after time of jotting my quotes in little notes encouraged the self actualization that I was more than I gave myself credit for

Ink gave me a platform to think and when I would close my eyes in a blink words instead of tears synced with my paper

Who knew a pen could mend the break in time unend and send the negativity away to fend for herself because I would no longer feed her

Not a writer, nor a poet, more of a thought projector

I write to bare my whole being just in order to protect her

If I were able to label these words I’d name them my soul protector.

My imagination bursts with color and relieves my thoughts of its solidarity to the comfort zone

Finally I’ve grown into my own and reaped some wisdom from what little seeds of words I have sown.